ProZ.com translation contests »
Poetry with a tune: "Translation of Lyrics" » English to Japanese

Competition in this pair is now closed, and the winning entries have been announced.

Discussion and feedback about the competition in this language pair may now be provided by visiting the "Discussion & feedback" page for this pair. Entries may also be individually discussed by clicking the "Discuss" link next to any listed entry.

Source text in English

Sunday Mornin' Comin' Down

Well, I woke up Sunday morning
With no way to hold my head that didn't hurt.
And the beer I had for breakfast wasn't bad,
So I had one more for dessert.
Then I fumbled in my closet through my clothes
And found my cleanest dirty shirt.
Then I washed my face and combed my hair
And stumbled down the stairs to meet the day.

I'd smoked my mind the night before
With cigarettes and songs I'd been picking.
But I lit my first and watched a small kid
Playing with a can that he was kicking.
Then I walked across the street
And caught the Sunday smell of someone's frying chicken.
And Lord, it took me back to something that I'd lost
Somewhere, somehow along the way.

On a Sunday morning sidewalk,
I'm wishing, Lord, that I was stoned.
'Cause there's something in a Sunday
That makes a body feel alone.
And there's nothing short a' dying
That's half as lonesome as the sound
Of the sleeping city sidewalk
And Sunday morning coming down.

In the park I saw a daddy
With a laughing little girl that he was swinging.
And I stopped beside a Sunday school
And listened to the songs they were singing.
Then I headed down the street,
And somewhere far away a lonely bell was ringing,
And it echoed through the canyon
Like the disappearing dreams of yesterday.

On a Sunday morning sidewalk,
I'm wishing, Lord, that I was stoned.
'Cause there's something in a Sunday
That makes a body feel alone.
And there's nothing short a' dying
That's half as lonesome as the sound
Of the sleeping city sidewalk
And Sunday morning coming down.

There were 10 entries submitted in this pair during the submission phase.

Entries submitted in this pair were rated on a per-segment basis. Listed below are all submitted translations of each individual source text segment.

Submitted segment translations

Translations submitted for each source text segment are listed below. Segments have had surrounding punctuation stripped, and the resulting identical segments have been grouped together, so each listed translation should differ, but the difference may be subtle (eg. internal punctuation or diacritics).

Viewing segment # out of 9

Source text segment #2

Well, I woke up Sunday morning
With no way to hold my head that didn't hurt.
And the beer I had for breakfast wasn't bad,
So I had one more for dessert.
Rank by:
+7 | -3
The line "With no way to hold my head that didn't hurt" has a clever double meaning since the phrase "to hold one's head" can mean "to feel good about one self" or "walking with dignity and/or integrity". However it can also be interpreted literally.
+1
Attention aux erreurs de trad sur le 2e vers "No way...that didn't hurt" signifie "toutes les façons me faisaient mal". En + "hold my head" c'est aussi "tenir la tête haute", double meaning! Les meilleures trad ne rappellent que c'est une chanson ! Brav
Bueno, me desperté el Domingo por la mañana Sin saber como mantener mi cabeza sin dolor. Y la cerveza tomada en el desayuno estuvo más o menos. De ese modo, comí un postre más.
The only one that I can actually sing to the original tune
the arabic translation is not correct.
This translation could have been more economical and poetic especially
لم أجد طريقة and على سبيل التحلية
I think my translated poetry/song with source text as above is better than 6 followers(entries). Unfortunately, my translated poetry/song could not be showed on the page. Ha..ha..
-1
Bueno, me desperté el Domingo por la mañana sin manera de sostener mi cabeza para que no doliera . Y la cerveza que tuve para el desayuno no estaba mal, así que tuve una más para el postre.
-1
Λοιπόν ξύπνησα, της Κυριακής το πρωινό
δίχως τόπο να κρατάω το κεφάλι μου που να μη με πονάει.
Και η μπίρα που είχα πιει το πρόγευμα δεν ήτανε
-2
Y bien, me levante el domingo por la mañana sin nada que sostubiera mi cabeza que no dolia. Y la cerveza que tome por desayuno no estaba mala, asi que me tome otra de postre.

Translations of this segment (10 total; 10 unique)

日曜の朝に目が覚めると どう支えたって　痛む頭。 朝飯代わりのビールが割と美味くて デザート分に　もう一本
日曜の朝 目を覚まして 痛まない頭をもてあました。 朝食代わりに飲んだビールは悪くなかった。 デザートにもう1杯
さあ、日曜日の朝だ、お目覚めだ 痛む頭を抱えながら。 朝食代わりのビールは美味く だからデザートにもまたビール
日曜日の朝に目が覚める 痛まぬ頭を抱えることもなく 朝食がわりのビールも悪くない だからデザートにもう一杯
日曜の朝、目覚めたら どう傾げても、頭が痛くて止まらない 朝食代わりに空けたビールは上々だった だからまた、デザートにあと、もう一杯
目を覚ませば日曜の朝 苦でもないが　正気ではいられない 朝食にビールも悪くない だから　おまけにもう一杯
日曜の朝　目覚めた時 二日酔いの頭を持ち上げるなんてできやしない 朝飯代わりのビールはイケたから デザートにもう一本
そう、僕は日曜日の朝に目が覚める 痛くない頭をかかえられず 朝食に頂いたビールは悪くない じゃあデザートにもう一杯やろうか
いやあ目が覚めたら日曜の朝だ 頭痛なんかないけど頭はふらふら 朝飯代わりのビールもオツなもの お替りをもう一杯ひっかけた
そう日曜の朝に目覚めたら 、何かに頭をぶつけずにはいられない。 それは朝飲んだビールのせいじゃない。もう一つデザートを取った
Viewing segment # out of 9